attacks on good people

i know a couple of women who regularly inspire and delight the people with whom they come into contact. i know them both well and they are good-hearted and committed to being smart about making the world a better place. they are both dedicated to their own spiritual growth - to living with less judgment and resentment and more joy.

so why do they each also attract real venom from near-strangers sometimes? over the years i’ve seen them attacked with a kind of cruel, derisive, go-for-the-jugular vitriol that i rarely see outside of romantic breakups and political contests. i’m not talking about a smug holier-than-thou response — i mean actively spiteful words and actions which shock me and seem completely over the top.

what is this about? where does it come from?

my theory is that my friends threaten world-view, and there is little more terrifying than having our entire sense of how the world works threatened (just ask galileo!). my friends tell the world in word and actions that something better is possible and worth working toward. for some that’s a welcome reminder, a call to hope, but for some others this is a huge threat and triggers their cornered-animal behavior.

i think the pattern is this: this attack response is produced in people who

1) have a more cynical world-view,
2) are deeply invested in the world working the way they think it does, and
3) sense the core strength and power these friends possess (otherwise the strong reaction makes no sense — they could simply be dismissed after some eye-rolling).

my friends inspire this rage because they threaten everything for these folks: the security of understanding the world’s workings, their own place and value, and their own goodness. by this last i mean that if it turns out my friends are right and it is possible to be both smart and compassionate, both hopeful and effective, both delightful and committed, both hilarious and serious, both soft and strong, then they have made bad choices and are not wearing the white hats.